Dream Record: I am in what looked like a dark and shaded doctor's office in muted pink colors. A patient next to me is going to get eye surgery. I am trying to avoid looking, as being traumatized by eye surgery in my dreams is a life-long reoccurring nightmare. In a short time I can see blood on the wall, giving the impression that there is a an extreme and possibly traumatic experience occurring around me and I am forced to at least know about it or acknowledge it.
The same people in this position of authority are also trying me to restrict me from using my bike, which is sitting outside the building.
Sagitarius Moon meaning for Scorpios: Begin a learning project. reflect and let intuition rise to surface. Be mindful of tone. Ground passion with patience.
Category: Inner-child healing, trauma, relationship
Conscious Concerns:
The next day, on May 15, I saw evidence of something that concerned me, and I realized the situation I hadn't been wanting to look at, was very much present and I was "forced to look at it."
A couple of weeks later, during the first week of June when B. was visiting (and not doing as much as he expected to do per usual) I both got a very intense eyelid stye which grew in intensity, continuing into the following week.
During the same period, back tire went flat. After B. spent a long time fixing it, the tire still went flat a week ago June 12. In other words, the same two dream elements showed up as related real-life occurrences this week, which happened to coincide with the full Strawberry Moon.
Initial Interpretation:
I'm having a chance to some difficult inner work on the order of a higher authority, who may be a bit cold and forceful in their healing approach in this solo configuration. This work has to do with looking at my old patterns and habits and face things about myself I don't like to look at, and not being able to escape this environment and situation for the time being.
Because B. and I are energetically connected, I'm having symptoms that are thematically tied to the dream, and hence, my traumatic identification with him. The dream is telling me that not being in each other's physical proximity might be best for now as I'm sensitized to his trauma so much, it's manifesting on the physical level now.
Key Symbols:
Muted, pink - Dark, nocturnal, hiding, shadow
Patient next to me: Not me and not for me, but somehow related to me, like the aspect of self that is relating to trauma.
Eye surgery - Fixing or removing some aspect of sight, ego, perception.
ChatGPT's interpretation: Woman getting eye surgery is a part of me holding space for someone else's trauma (which makes sense, as it started with my mom, and showed up through other dreams in childhood and now is manifesting with B.)
Try to avoid looking - Self-explanatory. My inner protection mechanism. It's not even my trauma but it lives in my psychic environment.
Blood on wall - Release of energy, attention grabbing
Forced to acknowledge it - Insight, self-awareness
People in authority - I didn't know who they were and didnt' really see them, I just knew they were in control. These could be invisible forces. I seem to be somewhat intimidated by them and see them negatively, but there's a feeling now of surrender and consider this stickiness, a cocoon not to fight or run away from (well, I can't anyway).
New interpretation: Surrender to the experience of facing this cold, sharp, intense exposure without an exit plan, even if it's difficult.
Question: What is this full moon illuminating?
Answer: My vulnerabilities and fears, my compassionate, empathic nature (as evidenced by today's sessions with hospice patients.
Insight: Is my way of coping with B's trauma in my space and his inability to resolve it pushing me to seek the experience of compassionate healing elsewhere. Is my role providing me with an opportunity to unleash all this compassionate healing energy because I can't express that part of myself with my primary partner?
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